It has been such a long time since i wrote anything and to be blatantly honest work has been so hectic that I just never get a chance to myself.
So to bring you all up to speed, life in General has been going through many transitions. I told you all about the fantastic new school my son is attending. He has moved up to Grade R and has got the most amazing teacher a mother could ever ask for when you have had so many problems in the past. (DR) Is moving forward in his little life and transforming into a Gorgeous little boy. We have become very close over the last few months and I now actually take alot more time out of work to spend with him so that the bond between mother and son can strengthen. I am currently partaking in a course called Nurturing of Self Esteem and although I initially thought it was a load of crap, I am slowly finding that there is some really great information and suggestions coming out of the course. I will admit that I am not entirely sold on the concept but there is value in hearing the view of others and putting some of their suggestions into Action has been fun. In this time I have learnt alot about (DR) and about myself as a mother and as a person in General.
In the last few weeks I have made contact with New and very Awesome friends (MA) is slowly becoming a big part of my social and personal life, she is as mad as what I am and we really connect very well. (CM) is still my Best Friend and I miss having her around alot more but we try to make plans to see one another as much as humanly possible.(AB) is back in my life, we are currently friends and I am supporting him through a very rough time in his life but it really is very Hard when your heart is telling you one thing and your mind is telling you to run away fast.
I met (AB) when i was about 16, we had done the summer love thing and even though we were very young, we connected very strongly. (AB)’s parents separated us and we both got on with our own lives but always had one another in our thoughts. About a year ago, maybe a bit longer than that, (AB) made contact with me via a Social Network. He was involved in a Relationship that he had been in for about 5yrs but from the discussions we had, I got to the realisation that the relationship was in alot of trouble… to cut a very long story short (AB) and I formed a very strong bond together and I later got accused of being “The OTHER WOMAN” AGAIN!!! (AB) and I broke off contact and I started to move past the deceit, hurt and lies but now (AB) and his partner are apart, she left him! (AB) is torn up, he feels lost, alone and guilty as charged obviously!! So now we are in contact again and my heart is all flustered and pulling to go down the same road again but my head is telling me not to fall for it all over again because it probably knows best as usual BUT… He makes me Happy, he fills that emptiness I have felt for the last 6yrs of my Celibacy, and he makes me want to be a part of his life, a part of his future… Am I mad you ask??? Probably but we all deserve happiness don’t we??
Well enough of my rambling, this probably makes no sense right now and I am sure it will in time but sometimes it makes things better to just write them down!!
Love and Light all